Saturday, July 30, 2005
hey my lovelys. how are you all. well im up in syracuse chillin in the hotel. lost some money today at the casino. josh did good. fun times. they are at the movies now, im not a movie person tho, so i stayed back here. i have downloaded so much shit its so awesoem!!! but anywho. i miss my krista kay. SO MUCH. i need to see her. like now. i miss krista nee too. i talked to amber online tonite for a awhile. that is always good. im this close to saying something to her for god sakes. about something... but i dont think i ever could. you never know tho. and i want to email krista frey tomorrow and ask her if she wants to/can hang out sometime this week or something. ya know, maybe i am the ass, or something, i love two ppl. and i have a huge thing for amber. maybe im the one who is not being fair. idk...... i guess it is me. but...these are m feelings, and thats that. i cant help i know three of the greatest people in the world. and care for them oh so much. ugh.... idk.. very confusing.. sooo... i guess that is all for now. hopefully seeing krista kay as soon as i get back, and hopefully seeing krista nee sometime this week, and hopefully seeing/talking to amber like everyday. im an asshole. plain and simple. welll im going. love you. always....
music: death cab for cutie - tiny vessels
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music: death cab for cutie - tiny vessels
Thursday, July 28, 2005
hey kiddies.. long time no talkie. im sorry. soooo........ my life. me and krista kay are together. im happy. i love her alot. ALOT. but it sucks when like im not with her. and then it goes 3 days w/o her and blows. and ambers party was this weekend, and i saw krista nee. and god, that was sooo goood. it was like ald times with her. and so i eamiled her monday, and she replied tuesday, and she said something that was just, ahhhh, so good. she was like, and we i hugged u at ambers party, and u let your had slid down my back, i amost lost it in a good way. that was soo freakin hot/cute. ughh. idk anymore. the more things change....ya know. i think im gonna email her and ask her if somehow she wants to hang out sometime next week at all. i let ya know how everything goes of course. well, nite kiddies. love you.
music: death cab for cutie - marching bands of manhatten
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music: death cab for cutie - marching bands of manhatten
Thursday, July 14, 2005
uh hey. no talkie for awhile. cause stuff has been going on. im in love. with a great person. me and krista kay are back together. and i couldnt be happier!!! today was such a great day. just beung with her, and holding her hand, and kissing her. god, im so happy we are back together. hopefully seeing krista kay tomorrow, bretts coming prolly. ambers grad party is saturday. dont know if im going, im krista would want t0o go with me. wooo wait. krista nee is gonna be there.... uh.. idk. and idk if ed is going. i dont know what i will do.. but it is going to end up being in the best interest of krista kay. be something to go with krista kay and then see and or talk with krista nee. ya that would not be good at all no matter what. well so tho. guess thats all for tonite. love you krista kay. muah. you are my everything. im so happy we are back together!!!!!!!! i love you!!!
music: copeland - love is a fast song
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music: copeland - love is a fast song
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
hey hey. went shopping today. got some sweet shit form h.co and such. doing nothnig tonite. justing surfing the net and listening to some tunes till real world AUSTIN comes on. yay me. about time for something to happen. hopefully it does. i really missed krista nee today. everything reminds me of her. i just miss her so much... well i dont want to bitch. prolly doing something w/ brett tomorrow. prolliy watching mike and vince. well im out. love you. krf <3.
music: cartel - save us
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music: cartel - save us
Saturday, July 02, 2005
hey hey hey. today was something. was at bretts last nite and then came back here for like what seemed like 5 mins and went out to sal val for a while, and on the way back home i passs krista frey but she doesnt see me. :(. i saw her atleast. and she looked good. i guess. she was wearing sun glasses. so then we go to big lots and on the way out guess who is walking in.... haha. its krista kay. i about shit. omg. i felt so fucking awkard. i dont know why. it just felt so like strange. like i didint even know her. we really didnt say more than hi and by. atleast i got to see her. that was nice. i miss her alot. just hanging out with her ya know. i just wanted to hug her so bad. im starting to really miss her, and us. we were really good togethr. and i really fucking miss it. ya know. god... i wish that it was the other way, that i ran into krista nee, but it wasnt. god, i would have been so happy to see krista nee. and like hug her and see the boys and everything, casue earlier i had passs carpet and dickhead was at work casue her car was there, ya she was in his car. that bothered me so much back then (oh quick side note, on the way to bretts on thursday, i went thru ligtstreet, and ppl were out at kristas old house and the light in the ktichen was on and some guy was walking into the door. that just really fucking got me. seeing the fucking window light up in the kitchen. knowing who many memeorys i have in the godamn house. ) when she would have his car, it just felt like they were really like with each other. i never actually have ever come to the fact that they are toghter. prolly never will. but that was just evidence that he exsisted yha know. god so much shit use to big me. why the fuck didnt i say something.y i didnt i just FUCKING KISS HER WHEN I HAD THE FUCKING CHANCE!!!!!!! she wanted just as bad as me if not more. i really just wanted to kiss her. she was ready to fuck me for gods sake. i was fine with doing the stuff we were doing. god, yet, i miss it all so fucking much. through everything last summer, one thing was there. KRISTA. i saw her everyday, i talk to her on the phone. we were us. she wanted me so bad. and its like still NOBODAY fucking understads how much this has fucked me up,how much she ment to me and still does. nobody fucking gets me. she did, but not anymore. shes moved on. im no longer on the side. FUCK!!!! the first "real" realtionship i have is having an affari with her. going around dickheads back. we pretty much were like i dont know but wew were like together there for about 2, 3 months or so. it was just not how i idmagine my first real relationship being. with a mom and 2 kids. but i loved them and god did i love her........... if she reads all this one day maybe she will relize how much my heart acks for her... and how much i care for her. i cant feel that same about anyone, like i fell for her. god i miss her, us, THAT SUMMER. well, thats the rant tonite, same as its ever been. goodnite my angel, dream of me tonite. i love you. krf <3.
music: paramore - franklin
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music: paramore - franklin
