Friday, October 08, 2004
well, i have felt pretty much every emotion possible in the last 2 days. last nite when talkin to my wonderful krista, she told me that by the end of november, she will be living with ed. to say i broke down is an understatement. i was a wreck. then came tonite. i had a very nice convo over the tele and she said that her and ed had an argument about how he treats his kid compared to how he treats michael and alton. i know that she isnt happy with him. i just dont know why she is with him. and then to move in. then she said she was going to wal mart. and i met her there. i was soooo happy to see her. oh she is so freaking gorgoeus. i was just complete happy when i was with her. of course we acted as we usally do. leaning on each other, and poking around. i put my arm around her. i then went with her to sunoco to get smokes, and on the way back to walmart we held hands and then i sat in the car and talk to her a couple mins and was holding her hand, then i got out and slowly let go of her hand, she said she call me tomoorow which is now today already. i love being with her soooooo much. she is soo perfect. when she got back in the car after sunoco she asked me what i was thinking, i didnt really ansewer. then later tonite while i was thinking i came uo with the idea that she keeps asking me what im thinking and i know she knows what im thinking about, yet she asks me. what does she want me to say. if i said something like i want you to leave ed not move in with him and be with me, or i say marry me tomoorwow. ya know. if i say something like that what the hell would be her response, oh why are you doing this to yourself and me. oh kevin, what am i going to do with you. yes i will. stop felling this way. im gonna have to say something soon, just because, she might say, yes im urs. well im watchin f1 practice. u are my world and my life and my everything. i love you krista!!
music: krista talking to me!!!i love you krista
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music: krista talking to me!!!i love you krista
Monday, October 04, 2004
well it has been over a month now seen i posted... and the more things change the more they remain the same. things with me and krista are just as they pretty much were. tho we have had some pretty heavy talks about our fellings. i have broke down in front of nate and amber twice now over her, about 2 weeks ago and last thursday. of course i was the all efternoon and evning today. and we acted together as we usally do act. like boyfriend and girlfriend. if somebody out of the blue would see how we act togther they would easily assume that we were boyfreind and girlfriend if not married. sinced there would be 2 kids runnin around. the whole time i was there tonight we were together and almost always touching one another, or hugging or just playing around. one thing that real( well first the thing that really bothered me or should i saw the 2 things) she took a ton of clothes there and altons crib to eds. it makes me wonder that the day of reckoning is closer than i thought. oh and she said earilies when ed calls im (me) not here cause he would kill me. ok, when did it become not cool for me not even to be at her house. i was like wtf. for what i think you know(ed) im just here good freind. i can be at her house any fucking time i want to be asshole(ed). now to te part i loved. she poked me with a fork befor sitting doen to eat, and she said something like checking to see if i was done. i was like almost i think i need to be flipped, and the look she gave me was like i want to be in bed with you fucking your brains out right now. it was awesome. oh and she like felt my ass like 20 times as she useally does when she is with me. why cant she just reliaze whe would be so much happier with me. i have and never would cause her any problems. her life would become so much easier. she would have 1 house, to live in (hers) she would only have 2 kids to deal with (hers) and unlike with ed, she would be the center of my life. she is the one for me. she is my world, my life, my everything, i love her with all my heart. god she is so perfect for me. I LOVE YOU KRISTA. i cant wait to see her tomorrow. i just wish i could be her only one.
music: ya its still hearing my krista talk to me
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music: ya its still hearing my krista talk to me
