the opposite direction

so the weekend that could have and should have been the best weekend in my life turned out to be another borning one, that was as pointless as the last give or take 100. it started out w/ a trip to the denist on friday afternoon, which for me is worse than going to hell. though it didnt last to long, which i was very thankfull for. then it was back to the homw stead for a pretty boring friday nite seeing as nate had his nieces bd party to go to me him and his amber couldnt go out. so that left me at home to find something to do by myself to keep from digging my eyeballs out. so i got to get the movies my mom got me for my birthday and i spent the nite watching "thirteen" starring the best actress in the world and the hottest evan rachel wood!!! i love her sooo much. after the movie got over it reallyt hit me how much i was missing my amber at this point. i had spent the last week waiting so impactiancely for the weekend to get here so i could spend it with amber. and to be crushed like i was that see couldnt come, i was just so freaking depressed. we had our whole weekend planned out and instead i spent it alone and bored in my room, just wishing that see was here right now. saturday bored the hell out of me. so did sunday even tho it was my birthday. i actually think it made it worse, nobady looked like the were enjoying the fact that it was my bd that it really depressed me. and amber wasnt there to share it w/me just made it worst. we were going to have the best weekend ever and instead i had one of the worst ever. the only highlight of the weekend was picking up andy with cory and anth and we went out to wendys sunday after noon and we had a good time. it was just the little relief that i needed so i didnt kill myself by sunday nite. so in summary what should have been the greatest few days of my life, i was bored to tears....i just cant wait till amber comes online tonite after school and softball. i just want to talk to her. i miss her sooooo much!! i hope that she will be coming down in 2 weeks. if not thank god for aol. but by then i will prolly by soo ready to see her again.oh and i have a meteo exam tonite so if that cuts into the time i have to talk to amber, i will be killing someone!!! i'll lwt you know how things go. later dayz, salut.

music: avril lavigne - dont tell me

ok today has come to a really shitty end. i must of done something during the day that pissed off the man up stairs. so i was online and my moms b/f daughter comes on and says that she is bringing some gurl named evie w/ her this weekemd. i was like wtf, amber was suppused to be coming this weekend w/ you. she says that amber is going w. her mom this weekend. soo at that point i was pissed, sad and sorta heartbroken cause i was so freaking looking forward to thia weekend and seeing and hanging out with amber. so i started talking to amber online..and we had another really good convo( it will be her shortly) and i think she was actuallly starting to show that she was into me. it so freaking suxs that she cant come...but i will still have our convos plus hopefully she will come the next weekend on the 9-11 of april... wow thats a liitle freaky the whole 9/11 thing didnt even relize that as i typed it hopefully that is not a sign or taonite would really fucking suck!! plus, yes there is more shittyness tonite, the cuse bama bball game had a very shitty ending to it.. bama winning. im now left to route for nevada..after that who knows? oh well hopefully the shityness is over and this weekend will be better seeing as it is my birthday. even tho it is i so wanted amber to be here this weekend for me to have a good time. pretty much nothing is going make up for that. and to think 2 weeks ago, i never thought that i would ever think this way about amber. who knew we would hit it off so good..i knew i didnt..it was a really amazing weekend. i cant wait to see her again...ya i think its sorta effecting me.. maybe just some...yep..later dayz,salut.

music: breaking benjamin - so cold

here is the first in a series of convo's from aim i have decide to put on my blog. the firtst one is w/ my friend ( hopefully g/f by this weekend(see the last post) enjoy..later dayz, salut.

NuchyBaby2006: hey you
KK61034: hey
NuchyBaby2006: whats up?
KK61034: not much, just watchin some tv
NuchyBaby2006: haha
NuchyBaby2006: cool
NuchyBaby2006: so....they scary things get ya yet?
NuchyBaby2006: man they scared me so bad last night?
KK61034: not yet
KK61034: haha, ya me too
NuchyBaby2006: man..i wanted to pee myself..ialmsot did last night...when iwas sleepin on the floor i coudln't take it i woke up to go pee..iw as so scared to run down by myself i slept in amanda's room
KK61034: haha, i was wondering y you never returnted, i thought the ghosts got u
NuchyBaby2006: you jerk...and you wldn'teven come save me
NuchyBaby2006: YOU COULD CARE LESS if they got me
NuchyBaby2006: lol
KK61034: if i heard a scream i would have came up
NuchyBaby2006: LIAR
NuchyBaby2006: lol
KK61034: i prolly would have just hollerd up if everything was ok, and not getting a response just go back to bed
NuchyBaby2006: =-O
NuchyBaby2006: meanie
NuchyBaby2006: after i helped you with that cover
KK61034: oh man, that was bad
KK61034: i was so freaking cold
NuchyBaby2006: i know..i had ice cicles on my hair and eyelashes
NuchyBaby2006: lol
NuchyBaby2006: i sitll think she was mad at me
NuchyBaby2006: lol
KK61034: haha
KK61034: she prolly was
NuchyBaby2006: lol...
NuchyBaby2006: i dunno i dont' care...lol
KK61034: she must not be a fan of whale noises
NuchyBaby2006: we had fun singing disney songs...and i thought my whale was funnie
KK61034: lol
KK61034: i heard the song today and she does talk about otters!
NuchyBaby2006: :-Pnot when she tries telling her story
NuchyBaby2006: omg for rela?
NuchyBaby2006: i knew it
NuchyBaby2006: lol
KK61034: haha
NuchyBaby2006: :-D
KK61034: she says se is friends with the hearring and the otter
NuchyBaby2006: oh yeah
NuchyBaby2006: they hearring and the otter are my FRIENDS

KK61034: yep, lol
NuchyBaby2006: the people who are people are white...and not savages
KK61034: ya
NuchyBaby2006: well gotta go....see ya later kevo
NuchyBaby2006 signed off at 9:12:40 PM.

music: switchfoot - meant to live

oh man, im soory there hasnt been a post in almost a month, but that can be artuted to the fact the my net at school has been done since 2/27...so i have been internetless for the same amount of time. and yes, it has been hell!! as they say, u dont know what u got till its gone. only one week left till 19 baby!!!! the one of two bd years that reallly mean nothing inbetween 18 and 21. but as of 3/28/04 i will now be able to go to adult world and by porn and dildos and dildo accesiors. so rubber dicks for everyone, the people demand rubber dicks - stifler ap2. till then 1 week of boring class. this past weekend my moms b/f daughter brought a friend with her for the weekend. she was the same person she brought w/ her when we went to the beach last june. we sort of became friends done at that beach, but we hadnt seen each other or talked to each other since then. so when she came last weekend i was pretty excitied. we pretty much hit it right off like it was when we were at the beach. on saturday nite we hung out in the hot tub for al,ost three hours and had a really great time. i know that i was flirting and im pretty sure that she was as well(well at least i hope so was) we can pretty much talk about anything toghether so its pretty cool. after the hot tub. we went to my room and talk for about another to hours then she went to sleep on the floor of my room. (ya that was reaaly COOL). so i think she was sorta of into me and i know that iam really into her. plus now i have her screen name and wehave been talking a couple of time's this week. plus no, i have found out she may be coming back next weekend as well. so it would be my birthday and she would be there. that would be great. i think the perfect gift would be for me to start going out with her. i would be the luckiest gut on the face of the earth. i know that is cleshay(really fucked the spelling of that up) but i think i now know what it feels liker to be in love and it is an unexplainable great felling to have. or she may have a b'f i dont know about or not really into me like that, and if that would be the case... well i hope it is not.. cause life is starting to really suck except for her. i will keep u updated on the operation amber 04.....till then later dayz,salut.

music: evanesence - my immortal